This is my thread

[ARon]

This old couple at my sisters bar asked if I was her son, we're twins. She doesnt look old, still its pretty funny

 

[S O F I]

I love it when I have certain views on something and then I find a book by a smarter person who can articulate them better. This is essentially my stance on having kids:

http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/books/2012/04/09/120409crbo_books_kolbert

I can't post it on Facebook cause a family member is pregnant and I care about hurting their feelings.

 

[Pittsey]

^^

I read 2 pages. Then I lost interest. But you don't want kids, ever?

 

[Jokerman]

I care about hurting their feelings.

Then hurt them. Unless you care about not hurting their feelings.

 

[S O F I]

right now as it is, no. of course, these thoughts are subject to change. i think if i hit 40 and i'm childless and unmarried, i'll think "fuck, i need a kid, i'ma die alone" but then that's a very selfish reason to have a child.

 

[Ristol]

I think it's easy to have big opinions about having kids before you have one. Any reasonably responsible person knows that once you do have a child, selfishness pretty much goes out the window the moment they're born.

 

[Chronic]

I think it's easy to have big opinions about having kids before you have one. Any reasonably responsible person knows that once you do have a child, selfishness pretty much goes out the window the moment they're born.

The article and S O F I were talking about the act of bringing a child into the world though, weren't they? I personally consider it to be an immoral act. You should just adopt, it's so much better. You already know what the child looks like and who wants an ugly child?

 

[Pittsey]

I think each person has the right to make their own opinion, and I don't judge anyone differently because they choose not to have kids. Where I work there are several couples who work together, who don't have kids. Double incomes. I would be seriously loaded if I could find a women on equal or more than I. It would be brilliant. Would I then want to give that money up for a child? Yes, I would.

 

[Jokerman]

Yeah, I don't really want a child either. As an "artist" or whatever, I'm a child myself. So there's really only room for one child in my life: me. But, really, I don't want to go through all the things everyone goes through raising a child. And then dealing with a teenager from hell and watching them ruin their lives as usual "doing what they want." If I had an average life, maybe, but I'm trying to conquer the world and make it bend to my will. I just don't have time to change diapers.

 

[Pittsey]

Yeah, I don't really want a child either. As an "artist" or whatever, I'm a child myself. So there's really only room for one child in my life: me. But, really, I don't want to go through all the things everyone goes through raising a child. And then dealing with a teenager from hell and watching them ruin their lives as usual "doing what they want." If I had an average life, maybe, but I'm trying to conquer the world and make it bend to my will. I just don't have time to change diapers.

Man.... People you know must have terrible kids. My son, currently, is perfect. I couldn't make him any better.

 

[S O F I]

I think it's easy to have big opinions about having kids before you have one. Any reasonably responsible person knows that once you do have a child, selfishness pretty much goes out the window the moment they're born.

as Chronic noted, you missed the point. the act of wanting a kid and bringing one to satisfy a longing is a selfish act. the kid didn't ask to be born and let's not kid ourselves, we're not doing society a favor by reproducing. I didn't mean that you become selfish after bringing a child into the world.

I know my stance on this matter rubs people with kids the wrong way. Of course, I understand.

Since we're on the topic, my question is, did you and Pittsey WANT kids or did it just happen and you rolled with it? If it's the latter, there's no need to defend a choice you did not make.

 

[Ristol]

I get why you're saying I missed the point, but I don't think that's it. I just wanted to present my view from a different angle. I wasn't trying to make a counterpoint to the article. I was just kind of responding to it with my personal views, which I think are related, but again, not a counterpoint. I'll never be able to look at the act of having children impartially again, and I think that's understandable.

Anyway, no, didn't want kids, felt similarly to the way you feel now. But after my daughter was born, I realized how childish and silly it is to make big generalizations about things you simply aren't able to comprehend. I think it's a matter of needing to mature. As for "defending a choice I did not make," I think that's a mean thing to say and I'll just leave it at that. You make your points well, but oh boy, too much teeth to them sometimes. I'm trying to maintain positivity as always, my friend.

 

[Da_Funk]

as Chronic noted, you missed the point. the act of wanting a kid and bringing one to satisfy a longing is a selfish act. the kid didn't ask to be born and let's not kid ourselves, we're not doing society a favor by reproducing. I didn't mean that you become selfish after bringing a child into the world.

I know my stance on this matter rubs people with kids the wrong way. Of course, I understand.

Since we're on the topic, my question is, did you and Pittsey WANT kids or did it just happen and you rolled with it? If it's the latter, there's no need to defend a choice you did not make.

When you fall in love (or should I say if?) you will understand why people want kids. Until then the conversation is pointless. As much as I would like it to, not everything follows logic. It took me 21 years to grasp that.

 

[Ristol]

When you fall in love (or should I say if?) you will understand why people want kids. Until then the conversation is pointless. As much as I would like it to, not everything follows logic. It took me 21 years to grasp that.

Don't you get it? If you disagree with him, you've missed the point.

 

[S O F I]

I get why you're saying I missed the point, but I don't think that's it. I just wanted to present my view from a different angle. I wasn't trying to make a counterpoint to the article. I was just kind of responding to it with my personal views, which I think are related, but again, not a counterpoint. I'll never be able to look at the act of having children impartially again, and I think that's understandable.

Anyway, no, didn't want kids, felt similarly to the way you feel now. But after my daughter was born, I realized how childish and silly it is to make big generalizations about things you simply aren't able to comprehend. I think it's a matter of needing to mature. As for "defending a choice I did not make," I think that's a mean thing to say and I'll just leave it at that. You make your points well, but oh boy, too much teeth to them sometimes. I'm trying to maintain positivity as always, my friend.

My bad, no filter, didn't mean to insult.

When you fall in love (or should I say if?) you will understand why people want kids. Until then the conversation is pointless. As much as I would like it to, not everything follows logic. It took me 21 years to grasp that.

What you're saying makes sense to an extent but it doesn't explain the fact that many people in love don't have children. I don't think being in love and having kids with the loved one is a a natural progression or a logical one. I think it's a norm perpetuated by society since the powers that be decided for us long ago, against our biological instincts and desires, that marriage and monogamy are the correct way of living.

Anyway, since you've been in love, enlighten us.

 

[dilla]

I have plenty of kids. Got millions of them in a sock somewhere under my bed.

 

[Ristol]

I don't think having kids is a a natural progression or a logical one. I think it's a norm perpetuated by society since the powers that be decided for us long ago, against our biological instincts and desires, that marriage and monogamy are the correct way of living.

Well, hold on. I'm no expert, but isn't procreation kind of the biological point of human life? Are we not conditioned through millions of years of evolution to want to procreate? To keep the species, uh, going?

I mean, to wit: how good does sex/masturbation feel? Feels really great, right? That's how strong the biological compulsion to reproduce is. I know your mind separates these things. But when you're watching porn or having sex, the reason it feels amazing to you is that you physically (not mentally, since we're complicated beings who can differentiate these things) need to procreate.

 

[S O F I]

I knew by calling it a natural progression, that I fucked up in the getting the point across. For the sake of this argument, I won't argue what you said up there. I meant, in the context of love, what does having kids have to do with it?

 

[Pittsey]

Since we're on the topic, my question is, did you and Pittsey WANT kids or did it just happen and you rolled with it? If it's the latter, there's no need to defend a choice you did not make.

If you mean, was it planned? Then, no. We took measures to prevent conception. They failed. Most perfect mistake I've ever made.

However, I did want kids at some point in my life. Still do. It just wasn't planned.

 

[keco52]

News is pissing me off today