It was the... ahh... umm.... weather balloon in the sewer with Castro and a babushka with an umbrella shotgun. If not, it's totally Mr. Mustard with a candle stick in the study.
You'd think any one of the rocket wielding Silicon Valley cocksuckers can send their little torches of freedom to "rescue" "stranded" astronauts but no. I'm like omg are they pulling an Apollo 13? Either way it sounds like they'll need rehab to get their body used to gravity. Katy Perry is going? LOL send Elon. Leave him there until....
You know the old joke... NASA spent $50 million to develop a pen that works in near-zero gravity and the Russian space program solved the problem by using pencils.
*Magic eraser on history*