Funniest Diss Lines Ever

[jerzeymobfan]

and 50, i forgot which song...where he diss ja rule he said hes starut little LOL...that white mouse..haha

 

[AmerikazMost]

"I been knowing you for years
We was high school peers
In Junior High
I was itchin' to kill and you was Ready to Die
While you bullshittin' niggas was dyin' and catchin' cases
Bustin' my automatics at motherfuckers in foreign places"
-Pac to Big

"Off the chain I leave niggas soft in the brain
'Cause niggas still want the fame off the name
First of all, you ain't rapped long enough
To be fuckin' with me; You? You ain't strong
So whatever it is you puffin' on that got you thinkin' that you Superman I gots the kryptonite
Should I smack him with my dick or the mic?
Y'all niggas is characters, not even good actors
What's gon' be the outcome? Let's add up all the factors
You're wack, you're twisted, your girl's a ho
You're broke, the kid ain't yours, and everybody know
Your old man say you stupid, you be like, 'So?
I love my baby mother, I never let her go'
I'm tired of weak-ass niggas whinin' over puss that don't belong to them
Fuck is wrong wit them?"
-DMX to Kurupt

 

[ARon]

"You finish my rhyme i see you think quick, well finish this, Jin i wanna suck your......
ahhhhh"-Jin
At fight Club battle in Puerto Rico.

 

[2pacdalegend247]

One of the funniest lines in a diss track was the Jay-Z line to Mobb Deep on "TakeOver".... "You little fuck I got money stacks bigger then you"....

 

[arab_thug]

"Say they shot me in my nuts, outa luck wit it, BULLSHIT nigga cuz im still fukin yo bitch"

2pac

 

[tHuG $TyLe]

Bizarre say g-g-gunit, i bet you add extra g's in it-Royce (apparantly Bizarre has a stammer

Yall a group wit 1 star like destinys child-Royce to d12

Everybody thinks your wack, watcha gonna do write a diss song to the earth? -Royce to d12

 

[tourniquet]

this nas diss is fire

 

[lVlakaveli]

I asked hip-hop for a single MC,
They said they'd send me 2, Fabolous and Jay-Z.
But these Gangstas didn't want to come up and sing on TV.
I'm gonna tell all y'all why they wouldn't battle with me,

Ok Bonnie, Where the hell is Clyde at?
He ducked me like a bitch for a little battle rap,
What you want me to do man, call out your fiance?
I'd have better competition battle rapping with Beyonce.
He's the king of New York, I'm a kid from the cella'
Only way he stays hard is by rockin' another fella'.

Sorry that I didn't have that much time to diss you,
I focus on Fabolous, he's my real issue.

Dude, you need to stick to doing Reebok commercials,
He showed up and tapped out after hearing me in rehearsal.
They didn't arrest you for your guns, it's because your rap sucks,
Cops charged him with illegally possessing 2 nuts.
Trade your throwback shirt for a skirt you little whinah’
And hike up your skirt, I can see your mangina.
You wanna blackball me? Well at least I gotta a ballsack,
If they lived at the spermbank, they couldn't get their comeback.

What songs this from...? I dont kno if this is a nas track or not...but i've heard pretty much every nas track and neva heard this one. Or maybe its cuz it jus never crossed my mind...

 

[blakhart]

What songs this from...? I dont kno if this is a nas track or not...but i've heard pretty much every nas track and neva heard this one. Or maybe its cuz it jus never crossed my mind...

haha this is by john cena... the wwe wrestle.

 

[H.E. Pennypacker]

haha this is by john cena... the wwe wrestle.

I am amazed. That's a lot better than I'd expect from a wrestler.

Here's a line I laughed at:

Ja Rule talking bout he's gonna slap me. Nigga please/
You gotta jump and swing up to hit me in the knees/

(Shit Hits The Fan - line is by Dr. Dre. The song is by Obie Trice)

Immortal Tech has somenice lines too:

"The only projects you've ever seen, are at your high school science fairs"

That's pretty funny. I like Tech, but he's always serious. Its like he never jokes.

 

[locomack]

I asked hip-hop for a single MC,
They said they'd send me 2, Fabolous and Jay-Z.
But these Gangstas didn't want to come up and sing on TV.
I'm gonna tell all y'all why they wouldn't battle with me,

Ok Bonnie, Where the hell is Clyde at?
He ducked me like a bitch for a little battle rap,
What you want me to do man, call out your fiance?
I'd have better competition battle rapping with Beyonce.
He's the king of New York, I'm a kid from the cella'
Only way he stays hard is by rockin' another fella'.

Sorry that I didn't have that much time to diss you,
I focus on Fabolous, he's my real issue.

Dude, you need to stick to doing Reebok commercials,
He showed up and tapped out after hearing me in rehearsal.
They didn't arrest you for your guns, it's because your rap sucks,
Cops charged him with illegally possessing 2 nuts.
Trade your throwback shirt for a skirt you little whinah’
And hike up your skirt, I can see your mangina.
You wanna blackball me? Well at least I gotta a ballsack,
If they lived at the spermbank, they couldn't get their comeback.

haha john cena. that was fuckin hilarious though. he dissed jay pretty hard.

this line was the funniest

He's the king of New York, I'm a kid from the cella'
Only way he stays hard is by rockin' another fella'.

 

[FroDawgg]

canibus: 99% of your fans wear high heels

and then LL flips it with a line 100x funnier: 99% of your fans don't exist (classic!)

 

[FroDawgg]

^^sorry, wasn't aware that was already posted

 

[snufflez187]

"ill have J to the Muah put his lips on this nine n really Kiss The Game Goodbye

beanie siegel to jadakiss on hands up (fuck naw put em down)

 

[omar_Izaz]

Jadakiss-Check Mate (dissing 50 Cent):..I ain't got a problem with clout/you ain't got shot/so wats your next album about.

Ras Kass-Kiss U (dissing Jadakiss):The sperm that created you/should've been head/or should've been that nasty running down your mothers leg

Theres more but these are the ones i can think of right now.

 

[Echso]

I am amazed. That's a lot better than I'd expect from a wrestler.

Here's a line I laughed at:

Ja Rule talking bout he's gonna slap me. Nigga please/
You gotta jump and swing up to hit me in the knees/

(Shit Hits The Fan - line is by Dr. Dre. The song is by Obie Trice)



That's pretty funny. I like Tech, but he's always serious. Its like he never jokes.

Check out Obnoxious and Freedom of Speech.

 

[IMAN_B]

Think you'll find it's 'Pet Shop Boys'. :thumb:

yeah i also thought it was petshop boys but it makes more sense if its "ketchup, boys".... cause the sound he makes sounds like a ketchup bottle that is half empty and that would make more sense and be whole lot funnier!

 

[CalcuoCuchicheo]

^
No, it makes more sense if it's Pet Shop Boys, as they are fags.

 

[Bleezy]

Nas in ether "I rock hoes, y'all roc-fellas"

I laughed at that first time.

i still crack a smile today to that one classic
same with "Gay-Z and cock-a-fella records wanna beef"

 

[imported_Makaveli_7]

50 to Ja

" Its been years and you've had the same niggas in the background, your never gonna sell Mitsubishi Tah, Crack Child... them niggas just SUCK, they no good....."

I know people hate on 50, but that shits funny.