Funniest Diss Lines Ever

[Rather Unique]

Nas - Ether

''What You Think You Gettin Girl Now Cuz Of Your Looks''(And In The Background Nas Is Saying Girl, Girls, Girls, Girls, From Jay-Z Song Girls, Girls Girls) lmao Shit Had Me In Stiches

LL Cool J - Rip The Jacker Strikes Back

''Tell Wyclef Dont Even Turn The Fucking Mic On''

lol Shit That Was So True

2pac - Hit Em Up

''Thats Why I Fucked Your Bitch, You Fat Motherfucker''

People Might Of Been Shocked About This Diss Track, But Shit I Was Laughin

Carry On The List Of The Funniest Diss Lines Ever

 

[CalcuoCuchicheo]

LOL!!

I loved that LL line.

It was so simple but so cruel at the same time.

The Eazy line 'where you find that anorexic rapper'....that shit had me laughing.

 

[Rather Unique]

LL Cool J - Rip The Jacker Strikes Back

''Betta Run And Get The Fugees'' And In The Background He Is Immtatin 1 Of There Song Sayng ''OH LALALALALA''

lol That Shit Was Comedy

 

[CalcuoCuchicheo]

^
That too lol!!

Also the Tyson line, 'Fresh outta jail, ass cheeks still black & blue'

I found that particularly funny because it's pretty obvious that Canibus had Tyson on his song for some sort of credibility & LL just verbally bitchslapped him lol


The Jay line too, 'You little fuck, I got money stacks that's bigger than you'

 

[ghitzah]

nas response to 50's "piggy bank"


Afermitive action verball attack word assassin
murda tactics burn a track back to Curtis Jackson
pac would turn in his casket, but you maken me laugh
to see you get in the game from all the dicks you take in the ass
while you fake on a track and act like you a gangsta in rap
theirs real street *****s who could break you in half
but since 'em signed you, you run around and claim you can rap
like 'em just paved you a path or xxxen gave you a pass
a fee bee to make up for every slave that he had
or every racist comment that he made in the past
I done herd you say a million times that you killed a guy
but Black Child stabbed you and that ***** still alive
you aint even bruised no one, you have the dirty cops
do your dirty work you aint even had to use yo gun
you real hard in the studio poppin sh** in a mic booth
you dont wanna have me fight you you wanna have me write you
talkin bout "Nas my son wants to be just like you"
well if you ask the street *****s eminem over hyped you
each bullet in yo ass is a symbol in its place
to remind you how hated you are when you see that dimple on yo face
just give up ***** you've taken enough
when you got all the people involved sayin you suck
and half the sh** you say you just maken it up
so now your own crew members haten yo guts
***** why da xxx you think yo whole crew is top charters?
cause your all pop artists your hip hop's garbadge
why the xxx you think you maken the same money as Britney makes?
g-unit is a boy band ***** and 50's fake
you real tuff till g-unit gets gobbed with sticky tape
and have my *****s run up in and robb yo piggy bank

{Hook x2}
So what you gonna do when sh** hits the fan
you gonna fight like a man or just kiss my ass
or threw all this hostility you piss your pants
I'm a short fuse and you lit the match

{Bridge x2}
Nas, a braveheart veteran
name an mc I aint better then
you against me you could never win
meet me in the streets we can settle this

{Verse 2}
When I'm speakin threw rap, you *****s deepin my wrath
sh** mixed with emotions makes it hard to keep it on wax
cause it can steer off a track and coserveer off of rap
and have *****s jump you till your left breathin with gasps
and each have you stabbed and all of my people in masks
so you cant identify to the police who attacked
just *****s reachin for straps and heaters bringen out gats
and watch this thug turn pussy when he pees in his pants
*****s callin my name, I can turn '50 cents' into a 'Buck'
invest it in the 'Bank' and spend it all in the 'Game'
a ball and a chain with an anchor tied to your ankel
and hang you until you dangel and break you apart from each angle
and repeatededly kill you with my freedom of speech
so you can look at my lyrics and read 'em and weap
so you don't run with cops? ***** niether do we
but your right hand man is the cheif of police
beef in rap cause you aint got the balls to beef in the streets
cause you'd get another lil cute dimple on your cheek with the heat
yeah I got my wifey tattoo'd on my arm
while you got a "Nas' biggest fan" sign glued to your thong
while you shake yo lil ass for them record exects
and blow kisses and suck up so they'll send you a check
but never the less I knew about you steppin to X
but interscope made you take it off the track to settle your debts
to calm your beefs, you b**** made put a switch blade threw your rib cage
and watch your chest leak in the street like bootleg mixtapes
aint no need to dictate, line up your calvulry
you talk that gangsta sh** and get it twisted with reality
ayo my pistol got the flue and my bullets got allergies
so if the trigga sneeze you gone be anotha casualty

{Hook x2}
So what you gonna do when sh** hits the fan
you gonna fight like a man or just kiss my ass
or threw all this hostility you piss your pants
I'm a short fuse and you lit the match

{Bridge x2}
Nas, a braveheart veteran
name an mc I aint better then
you against me you could never win
meet me in the streets we can settle this

 

[imported_MAKaveli_10]

That Eazy E rhyme is hiliarious.

 

[Trump Tite]

Do you want me what's your phone number, I get around
Cali Love to my true Thugs, picture me now
Still down for that Death Row sound, searchin for paydays
No longer Dre Day, arrivederci
Blown and forgotten, rotten for plottin Child's Play
Check your sexuality, as fruity as this Alize
Quick to jump ship, punk trick, what a dumb move
Cross Death Row, now who you gon' run to?
Lookin for suckers cause you similar
Pretendin to be hard, oh my God, check your temperature
Screamin Compton, but you can't return, you ain't heard
Brothers pissed cause you switched and escaped to the burbs
Mob on to this new era, cause we Untouchable
Still can't believe that you got 'Pac rushin you
Up in you, bless the real, all the rest get killed
Who can you trust, only time reveals -- toss it up!



Damn Pac totally rips into Dre. Dissed him bad. That shit had me laughing my ass off first time I heard it especially that "Check your sexuality its fruitier than this Alize" line.

 

[theblast]

"you don't spit so you obviously must swallow"

masta ace on acknowledge, his final punch line to high and mighty

 

[tHuG $TyLe]

That Eazy E line is hilarious lol

 

[WestRhymes]

Wow... If that Nas diss is real, no matter what 50 does, he lost... DAMN!

 

[cm_millionaire]

Nas - Ether

''What You Think You Gettin Girl Now Cuz Of Your Looks''(And In The Background Nas Is Saying Girl, Girls, Girls, Girls, From Jay-Z Song Girls, Girls Girls) lmao Shit Had Me In Stiches

LL Cool J - Rip The Jacker Strikes Back

''Tell Wyclef Dont Even Turn The Fucking Mic On''

lol Shit That Was So True

2pac - Hit Em Up

''Thats Why I Fucked Your Bitch, You Fat Motherfucker''

People Might Of Been Shocked About This Diss Track, But Shit I Was Laughin

Carry On The List Of The Funniest Diss Lines Ever

Fuck.
Doesn't take much to make you laugh does it?

 

[jbrolax]

Fuck.
Doesn't take much to make you laugh does it?

Thats the funniest diss line today

 

[2Pax]

Nas - Ether

You be no mustache havin whiskers like a rat//
compared to beans you wack//

I still laugh every time I hear this.

 

[Shot 21]

Did this thread time ago.
Mine were:
Dr Dre to Eazy E - "Weve got your record company surrounded, so put down the candy and let the little boy go." - Fuck With Dre Day ft Snoop Dogg
Ja Rule to Dr Dre - "Pour out a little liquor. And rest in peace Tupac Shakur. Cuz u let us know that Dre was a queer before." - Blood In My Eye ft Hussein Fatal
and more i cant think of

 

[WestRhymes]

Immortal Tech has somenice lines too:

"The only projects you've ever seen, are at your high school science fairs"

 

[CalcuoCuchicheo]

^
Yeah, but who was that directed towards?

The funniest disses are personal attacks.

 

[Flipmo]

' 36 and still in a karate class? You Tae-Bo-Hoe '

lol. I keep picturing Jigga dressed in a white karate suit doing kicks and punches.

 

[Tezcatlipoca]

Givin your set a bad name wit your misspelled name
E-I-H-T, now should I continue
Yeah you left out the G cause the G ain't in you

Dj Quik

 

[WestRhymes]

^
Yeah, but who was that directed towards?

The funniest disses are personal attacks.

He was battling someone named "Flow".

He ended this battle with:

"You don't know the Technique, so don't tell lies;
I'll shoot your mom in the back, and fuck the bullet hole until she dies;"

DAMN! Hahahaha.

 

[VENOMOUS]

^^^that line is a classic