1.If you think you're fat, you probably are - don't ask us.
2.Learn to work the toilet seat, if it's up, put it down.
3.Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if we can find the perfect present once again.
4.If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
5.Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
6.Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. It can't be altered so just leave it be.
7.Shopping is not a sport.
8.Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
9.Anything you wear is fine. Really.
10.You have enough clothes.
11.You have too many shoes
12.Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work
13.No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
14.Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
15.Most guys own 2 or 3 pairs of shoes - what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair out of 30 would look good with your dress?
16."Yes" and "no" are perfectly acceptable answers
17.Your mum doesn't have to be our best friend.
18."Offside" is a term from physics and refers to subatomic particles.
19.Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
20.You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both.
21.If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we really meant the other one.
22.Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
2.Learn to work the toilet seat, if it's up, put it down.
3.Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see
if we can find the perfect present once again.
4.If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
5.Sometimes, we're not thinking about you. Live with it.
6.Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. It can't be altered so just leave it be.
7.Shopping is not a sport.
8.Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.
9.Anything you wear is fine. Really.
10.You have enough clothes.
11.You have too many shoes
12.Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don't work
13.No, we don't know what day it is. We never will. Mark
anniversaries on a calendar.
14.Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
15.Most guys own 2 or 3 pairs of shoes - what makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair out of 30 would look good with your dress?
16."Yes" and "no" are perfectly acceptable answers
17.Your mum doesn't have to be our best friend.
18."Offside" is a term from physics and refers to subatomic particles.
19.Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. All comments become null and void after 7 days.
20.You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done, not both.
21.If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we really meant the other one.
22.Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.
