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You Know You're From Australia When...
The Greeks and Mexicans next door ask you over to have a barbeque.
You don't actually use the words 'sheila' or 'shrimp'.
You sleep with Aeroguard on.
You're wearing a cap emblazoned with 'Get A Dog Up Ya.'
You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread and actually grow to like it.
You actively dislike Americans, but watch their TV, eat their food and worship their idols.
Democracy means the freedom to draw caricatures of John Howard.
Your idea of a lethal weapon is a slug gun.
The closest you ever got to going overseas was your packet of 5 Days In Rio grundies.
A posh meal = an all-you-can-eat buffet.
The term "musical instrument" also extends to wobbly bits of ply-wood, hand saws, gum leafs and combs.
All of your internationally famous people don't live here.
You think footballers dressing up in drag on TV is funny (but your son being gay isn't).
You don't drink Fosters, but you let the world think you do.
The only thing better than beating the Pohms at ANY sport is giving them shit for it.
You love, adore and admire a particular team/sportstar/actor on a winning streak - until they lose. Then they're just crap and 'past it.'
You can compress several words into one - ie 'g'day', 'd'reckn?' This allows for more space for profanities.
You favour either Holden or Ford - or a souped-up WRX with new kit and a bootful of subwoofer.
Driving down the main street/beach road playing bad techno is your idea of a perfect Saturday night / Sunday arvo.
Your nickname ends in 'a' or 'o'.
You have a customised stubby holder.
Your soap stars become pop singers and move to the UK.
You've ever used the words - grouse, tops, ripper, choice, sick, rad, exo, ace, wicked, ballistic - to mean good. And then you place 'bloody' in front of it when you really mean it.
Your cooking apron has plastic breasts on it.
The "Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi oi oi!" chant has been a religious experience in the past.
Your politicians believe than sticking the prefix 'un' in front of your nationality is an effective way of making you sit down and shut up.
'Fair go for all' excludes indigenous people.
An eight-hour trip to go camping for the weekend isn't out of the question or excessive.
You take pride in living in a tolerant multicultural society but firmly believe that all Poms and Kiwis are fair game.
You insist on asking every celebrity who steps of an aircraft what they think of Australia. If the response is not overwhelmingly positive, they should be subjected to immediate public ridicule.
The private lives of footy and cricket players become more important than local and national news stories.
So that's the special ingredients that make up an Aussie - whatever your taste.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Austrailia.
You Know You're From Australia When...
The Greeks and Mexicans next door ask you over to have a barbeque.
You don't actually use the words 'sheila' or 'shrimp'.
You sleep with Aeroguard on.
You're wearing a cap emblazoned with 'Get A Dog Up Ya.'
You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread and actually grow to like it.
You actively dislike Americans, but watch their TV, eat their food and worship their idols.
Democracy means the freedom to draw caricatures of John Howard.
Your idea of a lethal weapon is a slug gun.
The closest you ever got to going overseas was your packet of 5 Days In Rio grundies.
A posh meal = an all-you-can-eat buffet.
The term "musical instrument" also extends to wobbly bits of ply-wood, hand saws, gum leafs and combs.
All of your internationally famous people don't live here.
You think footballers dressing up in drag on TV is funny (but your son being gay isn't).
You don't drink Fosters, but you let the world think you do.
The only thing better than beating the Pohms at ANY sport is giving them shit for it.
You love, adore and admire a particular team/sportstar/actor on a winning streak - until they lose. Then they're just crap and 'past it.'
You can compress several words into one - ie 'g'day', 'd'reckn?' This allows for more space for profanities.
You favour either Holden or Ford - or a souped-up WRX with new kit and a bootful of subwoofer.
Driving down the main street/beach road playing bad techno is your idea of a perfect Saturday night / Sunday arvo.
Your nickname ends in 'a' or 'o'.
You have a customised stubby holder.
Your soap stars become pop singers and move to the UK.
You've ever used the words - grouse, tops, ripper, choice, sick, rad, exo, ace, wicked, ballistic - to mean good. And then you place 'bloody' in front of it when you really mean it.
Your cooking apron has plastic breasts on it.
The "Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi oi oi!" chant has been a religious experience in the past.
Your politicians believe than sticking the prefix 'un' in front of your nationality is an effective way of making you sit down and shut up.
'Fair go for all' excludes indigenous people.
An eight-hour trip to go camping for the weekend isn't out of the question or excessive.
You take pride in living in a tolerant multicultural society but firmly believe that all Poms and Kiwis are fair game.
You insist on asking every celebrity who steps of an aircraft what they think of Australia. If the response is not overwhelmingly positive, they should be subjected to immediate public ridicule.
The private lives of footy and cricket players become more important than local and national news stories.
So that's the special ingredients that make up an Aussie - whatever your taste.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Austrailia.

j/k
we don't like you lot :thumb: lol