Film & TV Ralph Wiggum Quotables

ChrisZimbo

New Member
Staff member
#1
Hi, Principal Skinner! Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers.

And I want a bike and a monkey and a friend for the monkey.

Eww, Daddy, this tastes like Gramma!

I bent my wookie.

Lisa's bad dancing makes my feet sad.

That's where I saw the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things.

Look Big Daddy, it's Regular Daddy.

Look, Daddy, a whale egg!

Daddy, I'm scared. Too scared to wet my pants.

My cat's name is Mittens.

This snowflake tastes like fish sticks.

My parents won't let me use scissors.

Slow down, Bart! My legs don't know how to be as long as yours.

When I grow up I wanna be a Principal or a Caterpillar.

Principal Skinner, I got carsick in your office.

Dear Miss Hoover, you have Lyme disease. We miss you. Kevin is biting me. Come back soon. Here's a drawing of a spirokeet. Love Ralph

Bushes are nice 'cause they don't have prickers. Unless they do. This one did. Ouch!

I dress myself.

This is my sandbox, I'm not allowed to go in the deep end.

The doctor told me that BOTH my eyes were lazy! And that's why it was the best summer ever.

My cat's breath smells like cat food.

He's gonna smell like hot dogs.

Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulders.

When I grow up I'm going to Bovine University.

I ate too much plastic candy.

I ate all my caps...ow!

I found a moon rock in my nose!

I'm wearing a bathrobe, and I'm not even sick.

Will you cook my dinner for me? My parents aren't around and I'm not allowed to turn on the stove.

You have the bestest Dad. He read me a story about Chinese food.

Miss Hoover, there's a dog in the vent.

Me fail English? That's unpossible.

My face is on fire.

The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of there.

Your hair is tall...and pretty!

Wheeee... ow I bit my tongue.

It tastes like ... burning.

Oh boy, sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!

Was president Lincoln okay?

I'm Idaho!

And when the doctor said I didn't have worms any more, that was the happiest day of my life.
 

Stone_Cold

Active Member
#5
The episode where Lisa is framed for smashing up the animal testing lab by the Private Investigator that Homer hired to spy on her.

Homer has just confessed to Lisa about the P.I, and theres a knock at the door, Marge answers it:

Ralph: "Can Lisa come out?... with her hands in the air" Turns round and gives the thumbs up to his dad and his 2 officers who are hiding behind a bush.
 

Snowman

Well-Known Member
#7
That Super Nintendo Chalmers Is Hilarious.

How About "Will You Open My Milk Mommy"?

Miss Hoover> Im Not Your Mommy Ralph, Im Miss Hoover.(Kids Start Laughing)
 

Snowman

Well-Known Member
#8
That Super Nintendo Chalmers Is Hilarious.

How About "Will You Open My Milk Mommy"?

Miss Hoover> Im Not Your Mommy Ralph, Im Miss Hoover.(Kids Start Laughing)
 
#9
This one is good. Its wen homer trys to find out info on lisa so he hires a detective to find things out bout her. This is the detective interviewin ralph
Ralph: Lisa Simpson is a girl at my school.
Detective: You already said that. What else do you know?
Ralph: I picked my nose until it bleeded.
Detective: About Lisa!
Ralph: Lisa Simpson is a girl at my school!
Detective: Looks like someone already got to this one.

Or wen lisa hangs out wit the college chicks, and they see ralph wen ther drivin by. Ralph starts talkin to lisa and she gets embarrassed and doesnt want the girls to know shes younger so she drives away.

Ralph: Why do people always run away from me.
Starts to frown, pisses his pants, starts smilin wen hes done
 
#10
This one is good. Its wen homer trys to find out info on lisa so he hires a detective to find things out bout her. This is the detective interviewin ralph
Ralph: Lisa Simpson is a girl at my school.
Detective: You already said that. What else do you know?
Ralph: I picked my nose until it bleeded.
Detective: About Lisa!
Ralph: Lisa Simpson is a girl at my school!
Detective: Looks like someone already got to this one.

Or wen lisa hangs out wit the college chicks, and they see ralph wen ther drivin by. Ralph starts talkin to lisa and she gets embarrassed and doesnt want the girls to know shes younger so she drives away.

Ralph: Why do people always run away from me.
Starts to frown, pisses his pants, starts smilin wen hes done
 

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