An Irishman, an Aussie and a Scouser walk into a bar...

[Illuminattile]

Carl Lewis goes into a golf club and asks to become a member. The man at the reception, looking a bit embarrassed, says,

"Sorry sir, we don't let black people play here. There's another club ten minutes down the road that might help."

"But I'm Carl Lewis, world-famous Olympic gold medalist! I won nine Olympic gold medals, I was the first man to ever run 100 metres in less than 9 minutes 90 seconds!" he says.

"Alright then, five minutes down the road."

 

[not really ken]

^ I seriously don't get this one

And Saint, the joke before this would be better understood if your were from the UK

 

[Duke]

first off STFU! and im illerate? ur the one callin me a n00blar? like thats not even a word, and it has zeros instead of "o"s like cum on go back to kindergarten.

lmao

Good one Ilu, i might jack that from now on

 

[Illuminattile]

^ I seriously don't get this one

Well Carl Lewis is saying that he's a high profile celebrity, he should be allowed to join the club. The guy behind the desk misinterprets it and thinks he's saying that it would take him less than ten minutes to get there, because he's an (ex) sprinter. It's a deliberately cheesy joke.

It's a bait-and-switch. You read the first part of the joke, expect a racist punchline, and then when the (not especially funny) punchline comes, you laugh out of relief.

Supposedly.

I just thought it was good.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

 

[tHuG $TyLe]

haahaha at the Carl Lewis one.

Also LOL at the saint vs duke debate