The Gatorade Conspiracy
Have you ever pulled a joke on somebody, but you could never tell them about it because it was a prank so foul, so degrading, so truly evil...that revealing it would have had dire consequences? Like maybe spitting on someone's food or stealing the Playboy they kept under their mattress during puberty for emergency masturbatory purposes? (And yes: I'm talking to you, Chris Wallace, you thieving bastard!)
Sure you have. We all have. But this isn't the place for confessions, so please don't flood our inbox with comments about how you replaced your sister's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. If we really cared about your life, we'd call ourselves "Dear Abby," and we would suck.
No, today I want to expose the conspiracy the people at Gatorade have been perpetrating on the sports drink drinking public for the past few decades. I first discovered their dastardly plot back in high school, but just like when you accidentally walked in on your grandparents having sex -- ugly, sweaty, disgusting sex -- I haven't had the courage to talk about it. Until now.
So let's begin. Please look at the following image and tell me what you see.
http://basketbawful.blogspot.com/2006/03/gatorade-conspiracy.html
Have you ever pulled a joke on somebody, but you could never tell them about it because it was a prank so foul, so degrading, so truly evil...that revealing it would have had dire consequences? Like maybe spitting on someone's food or stealing the Playboy they kept under their mattress during puberty for emergency masturbatory purposes? (And yes: I'm talking to you, Chris Wallace, you thieving bastard!)
Sure you have. We all have. But this isn't the place for confessions, so please don't flood our inbox with comments about how you replaced your sister's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. If we really cared about your life, we'd call ourselves "Dear Abby," and we would suck.
No, today I want to expose the conspiracy the people at Gatorade have been perpetrating on the sports drink drinking public for the past few decades. I first discovered their dastardly plot back in high school, but just like when you accidentally walked in on your grandparents having sex -- ugly, sweaty, disgusting sex -- I haven't had the courage to talk about it. Until now.
So let's begin. Please look at the following image and tell me what you see.
http://basketbawful.blogspot.com/2006/03/gatorade-conspiracy.html
