just somethin i was feelin at the time

[MaKa\/eLiThaD0N]

just something that popped in my mind while i was typeing
_______________________
so many cities full of run down streets
but yet no one seems to want to speak for them
since pac died its like fuck em aint no one seem to care no more
full of gang wars pullin guns on others for the "fun"
shit is gettin hectic so i write my feelings down just hopein ya respect it if they dont im stil never gonna say forget it
keep hopes that it will hit some one with a heart and smart mind
and help change this shit in our time or the next generation
be a new elivation help in the elimination of racism in our nation
some much hatin on peoples skin when skin is only so deep
its what undernieth that matters ghettos full of shattered dreams
listen ya can hear it the screams of pheans lost by all means
in need of being redeamed although they can never start from scratch they can start on a clean sheet maybe get a place to sleep
in clean sheets be a new means of people in the street

 

[~live2tell~]

You produced some good rhymes in this one, my fave parts are...

shit is gettin hectic so i write my feelings down just hopein ya respect it if they dont im stil never gonna say forget it

and help change this shit in our time or the next generation
be a new elivation help in the elimination of racism in our nation

in need of being redeamed although they can never start from scratch they can start on a clean sheet maybe get a place to sleep
in clean sheets be a new means of people in the street

Keep writing :thumb:

 

[Cown]

Good poem. I liked the topics you wrote about and I agree that people need to open their arms and embrace each other or else we are all fucked!

Didn't like the flow, it was often off. I suggest you use commas and/or punctuations in the future to show the reader how it is supposed to be read.

Keep it up :thumb:

 

[kman_69]

so many cities full of run down streets
but yet no one seems to want to speak for them
since pac died its like fuck em aint no one seem to care no more

^^definetly agree with those lines....drew me in..

but i agree with cown, this peice definetly needs some punctuation...it makes it really hard to read w/o it

other that that, i think u got skill

 

[shattered dreams]

nice poem i felt you on this one i wrote the same thing basically in "one person can change the world" nicely written keep it up

 

[Belo]

I liked wat u were saying.. all very true so that was good
The rhyming and the flow kinda threw me off.. at 1st it didnt rhyme.. then it did.. and the flow changed too
If you work on that it will make a good poem even better
Keep it up
Peace