Jokes

[Casey]

I know there's already a thread somewhere but fuck it, I don't want to look for it right now and I just heard this and thought I would share it.

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses - in this case the sense of taste, using Lifesavers... the very young children began to identify the flavors by their color: red = cherry, yellow = lemon, green = lime, orange = orange. Finally the teacher gave them all honey lifesavers. None of the children could identify the taste...

The teacher said, "I will give you a clue. It's what your mother may sometimes call your father." One little girl looked up in horror, spat out her Lifesaver and yelled, "Oh my god! They're assholes!"

ROFLMAO

 

[SiGh]

Lmao!

 

[ill-matic]

Lmao!

this was sigh's contribution to this thread;

i.e. his presence

 

[SiGh]

I could have just thanked him and left like you did, asshole :angry:
philly.

 

[ill-matic]

haha come on, you're like that old, seedy, sexually deprived uncle that pops around every now and then that you can have a knee slapping joke with

 

[keco52]

if a parsley farmer is sued will they garnish his wages?

 

[SiGh]

haha come on, you're like that old, seedy, sexually deprived uncle that pops around every now and then that you can have a knee slapping joke with

Bahaha
I was joking too












why u gotta call me old

 

[Stred]

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the woods? Russel

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Bob

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs at the front door? Matt

 

[S O F I]

you really thought it was that funny?


no wonder you like two and a half men.

PG.

 

[Stred]

Two and a half men is awesome!

 

[Khalistani Soldier]

What do you call a black abortion clinic?

Crimes Stoppers!

Black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder,
bartender says hey that's cool where did you get him,
parrot says Africa! there's fucking tonnes!!

Theres 3 guys that go into the woods for a camping trip, about 3 days in they start to get really bored and annoyed with eachother, so they decide to go off and do their own thing for a day. So they go off and enjoy their day of doing their own thing, all of them are sitting around the campfire later on in the evening and they start telling eachother about their day. First guy says that he went on an amazing nature hike through the forest, came across a cliff face that was next to a lake and was jumping off that for a while, second guy says, Well i got sick of the forest so i went into town and had a few drinks at the local bar, met some interesting people and came back, third guy say, well i was hiking through the woods and i came across some railway tracks, so i decided to follow them, but i came across this lady tied up to the tracks naked, so i untied her and we had sex, the other two guys are like wow man thats awesome......Did you get any head?

Third guy replies, What Head?

 

[S O F I]

What do you call a black abortion clinic?

Crimes Stoppers!

sadly enough, there's evidence behind this.

 

[ArtsyGirl]

What's the difference between Prince and a dildo?

Prince is a real dick.

 

[Chronic]

An Irishman, Dutchman and Germanman walk into a bar. SiGh is a whore.

 

[Casey]

What's the difference between Prince and a dildo?

Prince is a real dick.

What the hell is your problem? Did he have an orgy with every female in your family but passed on you? FFS, at least keep it in ONE thread. You are deliberately inciting me and it's pissing me off.

Go draw a well and drown yourself in it.

 

[ArtsyGirl]

What the hell is your problem? Did he have an orgy with every female in your family but passed on you? FFS, at least keep it in ONE thread. You are deliberately inciting me and it's pissing me off.

Go draw a well and drown yourself in it.

No I just think its funny how defensive you get about Prince.

 

[_streethop101]

Don't worry, Casey, I'm the same way about Brad Pitt.
Every tabloid saying him and Angelina are finished gets my hopes up just a little bit...:love:

 

[_streethop101]

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the dirt, and cross the road again?...................he was a dirty-double-crosser. Hahahahehehahaheeeeeeeeeee

 

[Da_Funk]

I'd post some, but I don't feel like getting banned today. Maybe tomorrow.

 

[Shadows]

What did the dark kid scream when he had diarhea?

I'M MELTING!