"Crush Ya Enemiez"

[bigCASH]

this is my 16 bar verse that i laid down for the song my crew and i did earlier this week..the hook and the other crew members are'nt on here cause i wanted feedback on just my verse...thanks in advance to whoever checks out my shit

http://s53.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0BHBIQQVGTUJH2KGYCCOMEUMKO

it's not edited to perfection yet so if you couldn't catch something i said here's what i said in text...but i'd really appreciate if ya'll could listnen to the track so i can get some feedback on my flow and delivery and our choice of beat

big CASH...B.C. aka Nyce nigga...
i'm like any other nigga i'm tryna come up/
so i'm on the grind from night fall 2 sun up/
cars jewelry and clothes rocking a fitted//
if you ain't bout gettin money u got 2 get wit it//
determined 2 get rich i'm bout gettin them chips/
it's a grind like u out flippin them bricks/
money's real long when u gettin it quick/
even if rap don't work i ain't quittin this shit/
niggaz trained 2 be soldiers and want war//
but switch up when beef's brought 2 their front door//
i'm nyce on mics if u seek 4 da best/
like Miami did shaq you'll get da heat 2 ya chest/
da only burner u got is that ho u fuckin//
stop tryna act hard niggaz no u frontin//
stop fakin and hatin get yo money and ya mind right/
stop procrastinatin cause now the time's right/

 

[Hymnz]

its not a bad verse but you need to take more time with the lyrics, although i really liked some parts of it. overall, 6 thumbs up...

 

[bigCASH]

yeah you're right i do need to take more time with my lyrics...cause most of the time i'll be in the booth like Pac drunk and high...wirte my shit down as fast as i can then just get it done

 

[bigCASH]

bump

 

[bigCASH]

dam now i remember why i stopped posting here for a while

 

[WayCide-Ridah]

it was simple, but yet for some reason I liked it...lyrics could be improved....I give it 6.5/10
Maybe you could post a whole song next time.

 

[Shot 21]

I like these lyrics. Flows ok. Like the beat. Good subject. Not much more else to say cuz its very short.

Keep up the good work.

 

[B.Lorenzo]

can you re-up

 

[bigCASH]

can you re-up

here it is...http://s55.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=34MCQREN68XMY070IXZAMXSOE6

 

[B.Lorenzo]

Grimey, Street, I like it I would definately work with ya. I would like to hear you again to get an overall feel for you to see if your str8 underground or can you be diverse in your rhymes. Do you have any pics up to see what kind of image that you have? But overall I liked it-it was HOOD. Also you need to make it a little clearer so we can hear you better I think the track would have been that much better if it were clearer....

 

[Ca$hRoll]

yo flow is str8, but like dude said above ya lyrics are sub par....
but fa real the delivery and everything sounded str8 to me...
i like that type of shit

 

[TG1 Ghetto One]

i think some of ya lyrics in that are deep, and i think you got a good rappin voice overall i like it, i think i have heard that beat before