Are You Lonely?

[Da_Funk]

I would just like to take a moment and say I'm not lonely.


That is all.

 

[Chronic]

superman

That actually made me laugh lol.

 

[bacho2]

 

[S O F I]

Jokerman's just promoting his company's new SSRI.

 

[SicC]

(I know this is a little long, but I go over history, aliens, Pyramids, Atlantis, crystals, colonics, and explain it all, so I hope you read on.)

Are you lonely?

Before you answer that, you should know what I mean by it. But first, what I don’t mean. I don’t mean do you feel lonely right now. And I don’t mean feeling lonely at certain times, as when someone close to you dies or you’re rejected by someone you like, and so on. Transient loneliness is so common, in fact, that we simply accept it as part of life. I’m also not asking if you spend a lot of time alone. We all need time to ourselves and most artistic or scientific endeavors may involve long stretches of solitude. People who are unable to tolerate solitude for any length of time are often judged to be needy or neurotic.

We can all slip in and out of loneliness. Loneliness becomes an issue of serious concern when it settles in long enough to create a persistent, self-reinforcing loop of negative thoughts and behaviors. So what I mean by loneliness is social isolation. The subjective feelings of isolation, not the physical reality. Whether you’re at home with your family, working in a crowded office, touring Disneyland, or sitting alone somewhere, do you feel disconnected from everyone? Out of tune with the people around you? Do you often feel that you’re no longer close to anyone? That no one really knows you well? That there’s no one you can really turn to?

If you can say you often feel or think like that, or even sometimes, then you are lonely. And if you often feel this way, but it doesn’t really bother you that much because you’ve accepted this as your situation, who you are, maybe even special because of it, and so you don’t think of yourself as “lonely,” then you’re really deep into a state of loneliness.

With that in mind, now answer the question. Are you lonely?

Or, to make it easier, does that describe how you feel often, sometimes, rarely, or never? Elaborate as you wish. If I get a good response, I'll tell why it's a big problem and what can be done.

Whether you’re at home with your family, working in a crowded office, touring Disneyland, or sitting alone somewhere, do you feel disconnected from everyone? Out of tune with the people around you? Do you often feel that you’re no longer close to anyone? That no one really knows you well? That there’s no one you can really turn to?

I can relate to this in paticular Jokerman. Do I have a problem? Perhaps, do I care at the end of the day? Not really.

pz

 

[Jokerman]

I can relate to this in paticular Jokerman. Do I have a problem? Perhaps. Do I care at the end of the day? Not really.

And not caring "at the end of the day" is merely another defense mechanism you've developed. There are risks in letting go of self-protective, isolating behavior. People hang on to defense mechanisms because, at least for the short term, they seem to do the job. But the evidence shows that the temporary "protection" provided by defensiveness comes at a high long-term cost.

Not only does chronic loneliness make one depressed and alter behavior but it shows up in measurements of stress hormones, immune function, and cardiovascular function. It increases the risk of dying from heart disease, cancer, and a broader category that includes respiratory, gastrointestinal, and all other causes of death. Social isolation is on a par with high blood pressure, obesity, lack of exercise, or smoking as a risk factor for illness and early death.

 

[Bender]

It makes sense that people who make long posts are often more lonely than other people who post on internet forums

 

[Da_Funk]

It makes sense that people who make long posts are often more lonely than other people who post on internet forums

To a degree, yes. It could also be argued that people who make longer posts on the internet are just more sociable. In reality its probably a mix between the two.

 

[Preach]

aaaaaaaaaaawkwaaaaaard.

 

[Stred]

no, i feel as though the spotlight is always on me.

 

[raywaters11]

^^^ then why werent you nominated for most popular member

 

[Shadows]

no, i feel as though the spotlight is always on me.

Quick, get a tat on your right arm "All eyes on Me."

 

[lii]

And not caring "at the end of the day" is merely another defense mechanism you've developed. There are risks in letting go of self-protective, isolating behavior. People hang on to defense mechanisms because, at least for the short term, they seem to do the job. But the evidence shows that the temporary "protection" provided by defensiveness comes at a high long-term cost.

Not only does chronic loneliness make one depressed and alter behavior but it shows up in measurements of stress hormones, immune function, and cardiovascular function. It increases the risk of dying from heart disease, cancer, and a broader category that includes respiratory, gastrointestinal, and all other causes of death. Social isolation is on a par with high blood pressure, obesity, lack of exercise, or smoking as a risk factor for illness and early death.

for sure, i mean break down the word 'disease', is dis-ease. ease being freedom from concern, anxiety, or solicitude; a quiet state of mind.
you can create health problems by your own self criticism and negativity. you send those messages into your body daily, surely its doing damage. ignoring something on a conscious level wont make it stop or go away. we dont think about breathing or blinking but it happens anyway.

why not tackle whatever it is that bothers us and aim for health and happiness